You’ve spent a lot of time meeting people in your life & making connections in hopes to take little pieces of them to put together in you. That leads down a tricky little path of depending on everyone else to define who you are, your values, your opinions.
But then people start asking about you & who you are and you realize…I have no fucking idea.
It’s not fun. It’s never fun realizing that you have no (zero, zilch, nada – absofuckinglutely– NOT A DAMN clue) idea who you are.
It’s never fun wishing (for basically you’re entire life) that you were someone else.
It’s never fun to cry-out that you desperately wish you were not you. Because no one should feel this way. It’s crazy, out of control, unstoppable.
ANXIETY: Intense, excessive and persistent worry and fear about everyday situations. (Meaning 90% of the time acting in fight/flight mode).
It’s inexplicable. Never fun. Rarely understood.
SOCIETAL CATEGORY: crazy
But the truth is you don’t want to be anyone else. You just want to be you – whoever she is.
I’ll find her. Through faith, love for myself (despite its current weakness), and the need to feel whole in who I am.
I’ll find her – I’ll find her for myself.